Do you find it difficult to discuss with your adult children what should happen with your finances towards the end of your life?
If so, you’re not alone.
People don’t like thinking about their own mortality or losing control. Moreover, as family relationships aren’t always easy, discussing issues such as power of attorney, healthcare proxies, and estate planning can get very complicated. For these reasons, many families push off this conversation for too long.
If you don’t speak with your adult children about your finances, they may have difficulty picking up the pieces and taking care of you and your affairs if you become too infirm to take care of yourself. The emotional and monetary effects of taking care of an elderly parent without any direction can be very hard, especially if your adult children are raising families of their own at the same time.
How to have “the talk”
The best way to let your adult children into your finances is to talk with them. If you can’t do that for any reason, compose a list of all your assets, where they are, and what you want to happen when you’re no longer able to look after them yourself. Make sure to sign the appropriate documents so your children have the legal means to make financial decisions on your behalf (Power of Attorney, Trading Authorization, etc.)
If you have a financial advisor, invite your adult children to attend the meetings. Let them know who helps you with your finances and who to ask for reliable, objective advice when necessary. While you can’t ever know exactly how long you will live or stay healthy, taking a disciplined approach and sharing your financial situation, goals, and strategies can save a lot of heartache for everyone down the road.
For more about why sharing your financial information with your adult children is so important, watch this short video I made: Profile-Financial.com/letting-go
Douglas Goldstein, CFP®, GFP®, is the director of Profile Investment Services, Ltd. www.profile-financial.com. He is a licensed financial professional both in the U.S. and Israel. Call (02) 624-2788 for a consultation on how to set up your American assets to meet your financial goals. Securities offered through Portfolio Resources Group, Inc. Member FINRA, SIPC, MSRB, FSI. The opinions expressed are those of the author and not those of Portfolio Resources Group, Inc. or its affiliates. Neither PRG nor its affiliates give tax or legal advice.
Published June 26, 2017. Updated October 2019. Updated February 2022